For months I had been dreading my 2011 birthday on April 5th; a milestone which only serves to remind me that my life and ministry are not what I had hoped for during this season of life. Hope for a specific ministry had long been buried, along with my late husband, Mark. This is not to say that I'm ungrateful or unfulfilled. I have joy in how He has blessed me with work, friends and family, as well as through opportunities to serve Him. It has simply been a time of serious reflection, wondering if I will still be "fresh and green" as I age (Psalm 92:14). My recent health history has been a catalyst for these ponderings.
January 3, 2011 is when I first noticed another kidney stone. The familiar pinching pressure had returned. The same twinge of pain which I had experienced 3 times last year before undergoing surgeries. Because my insurance would improve dramatically on April 1, I was determined to wait until then to see a doctor, so long as the pain didn't get unbearable in the interim. For those 3 months I had varying degrees of 24/7 pain, anxious to get it blasted and be done with it.
Friday, April 1st arrived with my doctor confirming the presence of blood and the evidence of a stone. A CT scan was scheduled for the following Tuesday. On Sunday morning, I was in the worse pain I'd had since January. The discomfort during worship singing forced me to sit down during the last song.
Pastor Matt Heard's teaching was the last in a series on the Lord's Prayer. In his message, Submitting to His Shield, Matt shared two things that sank deeply into my heart. One was about wings from a psalm I am quite familiar with, Psalm 91. It reads in part, "Under His wings you will find refuge." I learned that in scripture, the Lord often referred to his "wings," representing his protection, covering, and healing." This reference to wings can also be found in Malachi 4:2, "For you who revere my name, the sun of righteousness (prophecy of Jesus) will rise with healing in its wings." Jesus' statement in Luke 13:34 also references wings, "How often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings..." I was profoundly touched by the tender heart of God toward us.
Tied into that symbolism was Matt's demonstration of the rabbi's (and Jesus') robe. On each "wing" (corner) of the robe were four tassles, again representing the healing, covering, and protection of God. Together the wings and tassles were referred to as the hem of the garment.
Jesus was wearing this robe in the account in Luke 8:43-48 of the woman with an issue of blood for 12 years. In her desperation to be healed, she came up behind Jesus and reached for the wings, the hem of his garment, and the healing power of Jesus went from him to this woman and she was immediately healed.
On hearing about the symbolism of the robe and the wings, I was undone. Tears flowed because I was intensely aware of the deep and tender love of God for me and those around me. After leaving church, I couldn't get it out of my mind. I got home and read Luke 8. As I was reading and painfully aware of the kidney stone, I prayed something like this: "Jesus, you are my Healer, I'm under your wings, and I'm reaching out and grabbing the tassles of your robe, the hem of your garment. Won't you please break up this kidney stone."
That night I slept well. Upon waking, the first thing I noticed was a lack of pain. As I got ready for work and throughout the day, I kept waiting for the pain to return; it didn't. The next morning, Tuesday, was my birthday. During my prayer time, the Holy Spirit reminded me of my prayer for healing. I asked, "Lord, could it be that you healed me?!" Later that morning I kept the appointment for the CT scan. I felt great all that day, lighthearted and pain free. It was as if a load had been lifted from my body and mind. As the day progressed, so did my confidence that God had, indeed, heard and answered my cry for mercy. I just knew that no matter what the results of the CT scan would be, that God had performed a miracle. Even if the scan would reveal a trapped stone, the fact that I was out of pain for the first time in 3 months with no medical intervention, was a miracle in itself!
The next day, I finally heard from the doctor with the results of the scan. She said, "We could find no large stone or blockage - only a few very tiny stones that will easily pass on their own without incident - no procedure is necessary"
My birthday miracle! 91 days of pain ended after one despairing prayer while "touching" the hem of Jesus' robe. My heart was humbled that the Lord of the universe, the God of gods and King of kings, chose to hear my prayer for his healing and covering. His timing made it all the more wonderful. The birthday I had dreaded and had such angst and prayer over for the last several months, is the very day He chose to assure me that I am still His precious daughter, under His wings ... valuable to Him. Not only did he heal my stones, but He also healed my heart. A double-whammy birthday miracle.
I can't explain why God chose to heal me this time and not grant dozens of other prayers for myself and others'. I do, however, trust that He knows when His "yes" to our prayer will be the best for us and will ultimately bring Him the glory He deserves.
So, I encourage you, and myself ... don't stop praying. Continue to go to our God for healing, hope, deliverance and protection. He is our mighty Savior who longs for us to find comfort and refuge under His wings. I hope you, too, can praise God with me for this birthday miracle!
Read
Luke 13:34
Malachi 4:2
Psalm 91
Matthew 9:20-22
Mark 6:56
Reflect* In what ways do you need God's protection, covering or healing?
* Is God asking you to endure by faith in your difficult situation?
* Is there something holding you back from believing God for His promises?
Take these to God in prayer, take hold of the hem of His garment and pray
RespondUnder your wings I find my refuge, Lord. You are my hiding place, my healer, my hope, my covering. As I take hold of the hem of your garment, bring yourself glory in how you respond to my prayers. For you alone, deserve all the praise and honor. Your mercy and love are undeserved, yet I receive them with gratitude and humility. Amen.
To listen to or watch the sermon I referenced, go to one of the following links:
http://www.woodmenvalley.org/interact
http://vimeo.com/21998245
© copyright 2011. Sandra Dowling Housley.
January 3, 2011 is when I first noticed another kidney stone. The familiar pinching pressure had returned. The same twinge of pain which I had experienced 3 times last year before undergoing surgeries. Because my insurance would improve dramatically on April 1, I was determined to wait until then to see a doctor, so long as the pain didn't get unbearable in the interim. For those 3 months I had varying degrees of 24/7 pain, anxious to get it blasted and be done with it.
Friday, April 1st arrived with my doctor confirming the presence of blood and the evidence of a stone. A CT scan was scheduled for the following Tuesday. On Sunday morning, I was in the worse pain I'd had since January. The discomfort during worship singing forced me to sit down during the last song.
Pastor Matt Heard's teaching was the last in a series on the Lord's Prayer. In his message, Submitting to His Shield, Matt shared two things that sank deeply into my heart. One was about wings from a psalm I am quite familiar with, Psalm 91. It reads in part, "Under His wings you will find refuge." I learned that in scripture, the Lord often referred to his "wings," representing his protection, covering, and healing." This reference to wings can also be found in Malachi 4:2, "For you who revere my name, the sun of righteousness (prophecy of Jesus) will rise with healing in its wings." Jesus' statement in Luke 13:34 also references wings, "How often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings..." I was profoundly touched by the tender heart of God toward us.
Tied into that symbolism was Matt's demonstration of the rabbi's (and Jesus') robe. On each "wing" (corner) of the robe were four tassles, again representing the healing, covering, and protection of God. Together the wings and tassles were referred to as the hem of the garment.
Jesus was wearing this robe in the account in Luke 8:43-48 of the woman with an issue of blood for 12 years. In her desperation to be healed, she came up behind Jesus and reached for the wings, the hem of his garment, and the healing power of Jesus went from him to this woman and she was immediately healed.
On hearing about the symbolism of the robe and the wings, I was undone. Tears flowed because I was intensely aware of the deep and tender love of God for me and those around me. After leaving church, I couldn't get it out of my mind. I got home and read Luke 8. As I was reading and painfully aware of the kidney stone, I prayed something like this: "Jesus, you are my Healer, I'm under your wings, and I'm reaching out and grabbing the tassles of your robe, the hem of your garment. Won't you please break up this kidney stone."
That night I slept well. Upon waking, the first thing I noticed was a lack of pain. As I got ready for work and throughout the day, I kept waiting for the pain to return; it didn't. The next morning, Tuesday, was my birthday. During my prayer time, the Holy Spirit reminded me of my prayer for healing. I asked, "Lord, could it be that you healed me?!" Later that morning I kept the appointment for the CT scan. I felt great all that day, lighthearted and pain free. It was as if a load had been lifted from my body and mind. As the day progressed, so did my confidence that God had, indeed, heard and answered my cry for mercy. I just knew that no matter what the results of the CT scan would be, that God had performed a miracle. Even if the scan would reveal a trapped stone, the fact that I was out of pain for the first time in 3 months with no medical intervention, was a miracle in itself!
The next day, I finally heard from the doctor with the results of the scan. She said, "We could find no large stone or blockage - only a few very tiny stones that will easily pass on their own without incident - no procedure is necessary"
My birthday miracle! 91 days of pain ended after one despairing prayer while "touching" the hem of Jesus' robe. My heart was humbled that the Lord of the universe, the God of gods and King of kings, chose to hear my prayer for his healing and covering. His timing made it all the more wonderful. The birthday I had dreaded and had such angst and prayer over for the last several months, is the very day He chose to assure me that I am still His precious daughter, under His wings ... valuable to Him. Not only did he heal my stones, but He also healed my heart. A double-whammy birthday miracle.
I can't explain why God chose to heal me this time and not grant dozens of other prayers for myself and others'. I do, however, trust that He knows when His "yes" to our prayer will be the best for us and will ultimately bring Him the glory He deserves.
So, I encourage you, and myself ... don't stop praying. Continue to go to our God for healing, hope, deliverance and protection. He is our mighty Savior who longs for us to find comfort and refuge under His wings. I hope you, too, can praise God with me for this birthday miracle!
Read
Luke 13:34
Malachi 4:2
Psalm 91
Matthew 9:20-22
Mark 6:56
Reflect* In what ways do you need God's protection, covering or healing?
* Is God asking you to endure by faith in your difficult situation?
* Is there something holding you back from believing God for His promises?
Take these to God in prayer, take hold of the hem of His garment and pray
RespondUnder your wings I find my refuge, Lord. You are my hiding place, my healer, my hope, my covering. As I take hold of the hem of your garment, bring yourself glory in how you respond to my prayers. For you alone, deserve all the praise and honor. Your mercy and love are undeserved, yet I receive them with gratitude and humility. Amen.
To listen to or watch the sermon I referenced, go to one of the following links:
http://www.woodmenvalley.org/interact
http://vimeo.com/21998245
© copyright 2011. Sandra Dowling Housley.
