Ah,
a new year! I have always enjoyed
contemplating what wonderful blessings the Lord might have for my family
and me in the coming year. It's a kind of fresh start, a new hope! This past year, God fulfilled two long-
awaited answers to prayer.
First,
at the beginning 2013, I learned that my children's dad, who nearly 30 years
ago, broke up our 18 year marriage through infidelity, had finally come to know
Jesus as his Savior and Lord. When I
heard an apology from him for the first time, I knew it was real. The start of 2013 held many shed tears of joy
over his change of heart; something I had prayed for since I first met Jesus
personally.
Second
answer to prayer: 5-1/2 years ago, I began praying that God would move Carolyn
and her family from Florida California Colorado
The
elation of these two answers to prayer have reaffirmed my belief that prayer is
never futile, but is a powerful privilege.
And we should never give up on presenting our requests to God, trusting
He knows what is best (Philippians 4:7).
For
most of my Christian life, I have annually set aside some time during the final
week of the year to reflect on how I can grow deeper with God. I ask myself:
Are my relationships God-honoring?
Am I growing spiritually? Am I
sharing my faith fruitfully? What
weaknesses, bad habits, strongholds of the enemy or sin need the most
Spirit-work in the coming year? As I
prayed about it, the Lord was always faithful to point out what needed His
gentle "tweaking." Sometimes
at the end of the year I found I had gained small victories. At other times,
sadly, I had failed to overcome certain sins or habits! How often my frail faith became evident
during those end-of-year reflections.
This
week, as I asked God about what to share in a new year's blog, He reminded me
of one I'd written the year after we learned Mark had terminal prostate cancer.
As I re-read it, I marveled at prayer's
enduring influence and clout, not only when life is good and fair, but when it takes
us where we don't want to go. Here is
part of that blog:
Last year as the new year
began, I was praising God that we'd had one of the best years of marriage;
however, I was also anxious about what may lie ahead. Mark and I were awaiting the results of a
biopsy. By mid-January we learned that Mark had aggressive prostate cancer, in
the final stage. Further testing showed
he had several tumors in his bones; the cancer was had already metastasized,
and the doctors gave no hope for recovery.
We have now walked through
one full year of that trial. Though Mark's cancer is wreaking havoc in his
body, and in my emotions, somehow, somewhere deep inside, we are both growing
in grace and grasping how impossible this trial would be without the prayers of
others, and the constant presence of
Christ to strengthen us and give us courage.
A couple of weeks ago, as I
thought of what may lie ahead this coming year; I was battling depression and
the urge to panic. For the first time
that I can remember, I was experiencing the new year blues. After a friend prayed with me, the peace of
God began to settle in.
It was then that I read through my prayer
journals. You know what I saw? Fear assuaged through the power of God's
Word. Hope renewed after praying with a
pastor or friend. God's constancy amidst
emotional and physical ups and downs. He
dried our tears as we focused on His truths.
Our load was eased by the prayers, sacrificial gifts, and comforting
words of friends, both near and far away, and by our "family" here at
church.
We've developed a better
understanding of our weaknesses and about how helpless we are to change our
circumstances. But God is not
powerless! As Mark and I continue to
pray for healing, we are also praying to be in the center of God's perfect
will, whatever that may be. And when
medical reports offer terror and dread to our feeble, fleshly
"hearts," it's then that I know God will beckon us to once again lay
our burdens at His feet.
So, are we looking forward
with hopeful expectation to the new year?
To be honest, not really. But we
are focusing on developing two good disciplines that don't come easy for either
of us: 1) Living one day at a time,
receiving from the Lord all that He offers by way of hope, joy, peace, and even
laughter, and 2) Striving to hang on tightly to our loving
Father's hand through prayer, and by faith, not fear, trusting He will not give
us more than we can bear. I love the
lyrics of a song I heard this week: "I don't know about
tomorrow...but I know Who holds the future, and I know He holds my hand."
May I encourage you (as the Lord reminds us) to focus on those words, and on God's Word
when you experience the new year blues or any trials this year? Our God is faithful—He alone gives us the
strength to trust Him! Remember
Zechariah 4:6, "Not by might, nor by power, but by My Spirit, says the
Lord."
May
God carry us all in 2014 by His grace, through prayer and faithfulness to His
Word, believing He has us in the palms of His hands...always.
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